Not sure who wrote that quote but it’s pretty profound.
Idearly is not a counselling website or app – however I have studied Psychology in my degree and have been married for more than 30 years – I hope those experiences provide me with some wisdom that may resonate with others. In the early days of a relationship everything seems rosy and it’s like living in a fairy tale. Perhaps some couples are fortunate enough to sail through life in the perfect relationship but my personal experience and observation is that most relationships, including my own with my husband, require on-going work and commitment and at various stages in life, external stressors can place pressure on our relationship. At those times, it’s easier for a relationship to veer off-track – every little irritation about your partner can become a battle field; a breakdown in communication can occur, resulting in loneliness setting up camp in the relationship; there may be a tendency to feel misunderstood and taken for granted. My list could go on and on but I think you get the picture.
According to Unified Lawyers (2017) the top 10 countries in the world have divorce statistics ranging from an astounding 87% (Luxembourg) through to 38% (Australia and Canada). Needless to say, the statistics are very sobering. According to that article, 44% of divorces are a result of ‘growing apart’.
So isn’t it better to work on repairing a relationship rather than throwing away all that you previously built together? It takes one person to start the process of forgiveness and to show that you care. Forgiveness requires several attributes and characteristics: the courage to take the first step and offer an olive branch; vulnerability with the possibility that your efforts and love may be rejected; commitment to do whatever it takes to express your love and thoughtfulness; humility to put your ego aside and take responsibility for your part in the relationship; communication to open the doors to possibilities and compromise.
Try taking some first steps if you feel you are becoming disconnected in your relationship. Download the idearly app to action some of the thoughtfulness prompts. Read some relationship books. Seek the expert help of a relationship Counsellor. There are a whole lot of strategies available if you are committed to making your relationship work.